EP out now - LISTEN
Ax
“I was never really insane except upon occasions when my heart was touched.” Edgar Allan Poe
Maybe you can relate to this quote. Love can make you do irrational things. It can bring out the best and the very worst in you. Love and violence are not that far apart; they’re both intense and uncontrollable.
Letting go of someone you love is incredibly hard. A breakup is a process that challenges your self love. Do you still feel complete after? Some people don’t. Some people won’t ever let go.
As part of my job in the canadian judicial system, I’ve worked on many murder cases. I’ve learned that “love” is almost always part of the equation. Even though I’ve seen it, I still can’t believe the fact that so many have chosen to commit murder instead of living with a broken heart.
Ax is not your typical love song, but it surely is a love song.
The song was mixed by Mark Lawson (Arcade Fire, Timber Timbre, Beirut, Owen Pallett) at the studio he shares with Arcade Fire in Montreal. It was recorded in my home studio.
Written and recorded by Delachute
Mix: Mark Lawson (marklawson.net)
Mastering : Harris Newman
Artwork: Benjamin Perron (benjaminperron.com)
Perchaude
Perchaude talks about helplessness. The situation that inspired the song comes straight out of a Hollywood movie, but it all happened in a very unglamour prison near Montreal, Qc.
Long story short, a prisoner was having an affair with his psychologist. Finding “love” or even just consensual sex in jail is next to impossible, so he was pretty delighted by the whole situation...until things went south.
This is where it gets weird. The psychologist was also in a relationship with a guard. The inmate learned that several months into their relationship. Of course, it made him panic big time, and for good reasons. He was well aware of how miserable his life would become if prison staff would learn about his involvement with the lady.
He decided he had to keep his distance, but the psychologist didn’t agree with that. She wanted to keep him in her caseload if you know what I mean. Since her reports are really important for his chances of being paroled and getting out in the free world someday, she had total power over him. She started to manipulate him to keep the affair going.
Now, that’s his version of the story. Is it the truth? I don’t know. Probably not all of it. I didn’t get to hear the other side of the story. If the whole thing can seem funny, I’m telling you it was pretty sad and pathetic to hear the guy out. You could really feel his deep feeling of helplessness. The feeling of having absolutely no control over his own destiny. I’m not sure if I felt empathy for the guy, but the hardship of his situation was so obvious, it inspired me. The grey background on the artwork reminds me of the drabness of canadian prisons.
Once again, the song was mixed by Mark Lawson (Arcade Fire, Timber Timbre, Beirut, Owen Pallett) at the studio he shares with Arcade Fire in Montreal. It was recorded in my home studio.
Written and recorded by Delachute
Mix: Mark Lawson (marklawson.net)
Mastering : Harris Newman
Artwork: Benjamin Perron (benjaminperron.com)
Sophia
"Sophia’s best friend wasn’t supposed to die that night. But she was supposed to be raped. At least that is what his murderer said at his parole hearing".
It was my job to accompany Sophia to the penitentiary to attend this hearing. She could not stop shaking, unable to contain her rage and that feeling of guilt that had weighed on her day and night for the last 12 years. Sophia was mad at herself for the tragic end of her best friend. It was sad because it was not her fault, but she wouldn’t accept it.
Sophia and her best friend were out that evening. Their university semester had just ended and summer was coming. They were finally back home in the country for the summer. After a few drinks in a bar crowded with college kids, three men, in their late twenties, joined them at their table. They were not there to celebrate the end of their semester, but it was a Friday for everyone. They all had fun for a few hours, talking about nothing. The three men made sure nobody ran dry.
And then Sophia suddenly had a bad feeling. The kind of anguish that is hard to explain the moment it hits you. She felt like the mood had changed. She was starting to feel vulnerable. That sense of vulnerability which unfortunately too many women know too well. That feeling I’ve never experienced. That feeling that very few men will ever experience.
Sophia took her best friend aside and begged her to go home. But her friend was in celebratory mode. She was certainly not gonna let the night end this way. Sophia insisted, but her friend didn’t want to listen. She kindly asked Sophia to stop being paranoid. So Sophia tried to chalk up her sudden anxiety to the alcohol and fatigue. These men's eyes, and the turn the discussion was taking was generating a mounting fear she was trying hard to quell...but they had “not done anything” wrong. Sophia therefore left the bar and went home. Despite being exhausted, she couldn’t sleep, unable to shake her bad thoughts.
The next day, around noon, she phoned her friend’s house to find out how the evening had ended. Her father took the call. He had not heard back and was counting on Sophia to tell him where his daughter was. Sophia was quick to call all of her friends. But no one had seen her. Sophia was caught in a horrible mix of panic and guilt. A feeling she now has been living with for the last 12 years.
It was not until the next day that the half-naked body of her best friend was found in the middle of a field. She had been held captive, raped and beaten to death. The three men with whom they had had a good time were arrested that same day. They were later convicted of the murder.
In this song, Sophia's friend is asking her to forgive herself, to ease up on the immense panic and guilt she feels. Her friend is in a way apologizing herself for placing these emotions on her. She simply wants to hear the voice of her friend Sophia, who has been almost silent since the tragedy.
We don’t know what the dead feel. But I can tell you that the pain of their loved ones is immense. For a lot of them, the guilt never goes away.
The song was mixed by Mark Lawson (Arcade Fire, Timber Timbre, Beirut, Owen Pallett) at the studio he shares with Arcade Fire in Montreal. It was recorded in my home studio.
Written and recorded by Delachute
Mix: Mark Lawson (marklawson.net)
Mastering : Harris Newman
Artwork: Benjamin Perron (benjaminperron.com)
